•°•mY LiFe As I ].x.[dReAm].x.[ iT•°•
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Tuesday, June 14, 2005
12:28PM
i'm going to be sent away to a youth home 2morrow around 8 A.M. idk when i'll be back and it really sux! but... i'll be on l8er! so i'll talk to who ever then
much love
<3
Heather
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
12:49PM
well, i'm back at skewl. i really don't have much to report. this weekend was kinda blah. my dad is back from chicago... he was at my older sister, Michelle's, wedding. she found out she's having a boy. Ryan Tyrrell-O'Hagan. my mom isn't going to tell my dad that i got suspended... which saves me from being in alot of trouble. she's been on my side lately... it's kind of scary!!! but nonetheless it's a good thing.
i peirced my ears again... now instead of having 3 gauge on my left and 1 gauge on my right i have 3gauge and 1 regular on my left and one gauge and 3 regular on my right... i just realized that they are opposite of each other. wierd... but that brings the grand total to 8 ear piercings... now i wanna get my belly button... my mom says i can this summer... which starts friday!! YES!!!
the gashes on my arm and leg from my cutting eppisode are healing. though... they're still gashes and look nasty. :-/ i guess that's what i get. i've promised Jester that i won't cut any more (not that promises haven't stopped me before) but i'm really gonna try to keep his. it's taken alot of phone calls from friends and a phone call from an old friend to really get me to stop. that old friend, if she's reading this, is Malin! i never really realized how much i missed our friendship until you called me this weekend worried a/b me. that means alot to me!!! thank you for caring!! i know your there for me and know that i'm there for you! i also promise you that i won't cut anymore... if i feel like i'm need/want to i'll call or e-mail you... and then of course write in here... but anyways!!! i'm going to count the days... it's been 5 days since i've cut... not to long but every little bit counts, especially on a struggle w/ something like this (which if you've never cut you'll never understand) looking back... i've fallen so many times... i've given in to the temptations... and thinking of that is enough to make me give up again... but i'm not going to! i belive i can remove the lable of "cutter" from myself. it will be hard but i can do it!!! i just have to take it day-by-day... and so far 5 days in... it's all good!!
well i gotta bounce
<3
Heather
AKA bad_TiNk_1369
Current mood:  accomplished Current music: none, i'm at skewl
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
2:06PM
i don't really like the way this poem is put 2gether but it gets out alot of my feelings
Continue To Crawl
I’m looking at all the things I’ve done to me
All thing things I could not be
I’m still looking for the answers
But they are no where to be found.
I’m on a path of destruction
Its me and me alone
My past keeps haunting me
Why isn’t is all just a bad dream?
But it’s not a dream, it’s real
Every scream is real.
The hurt and pain…
The things you never could feel.
It’s you that I want, and you that I need
But it’s also you that made my heart bleed
For my own sake, I must forgive you,
You’ll get one last chance
I know I will pay,
I know you will make me hurt
But I won’t leave you to yesterday
I won’t leave you in the dirt!
Know that my fate lies in you hands,
For my heart can not be broken any more
My blood might spill, my tears might fall…
But with you by my side I will continue to crawl!
-Heather R, Tyrrell
Current mood:  worried Current music: at skewl... so none
Monday, May 16, 2005
Sorry guys… I know this journal sux… but I’m gonna work on it some 2night hopefully!!!!!! It’s still a place for me to rant!
Well, I obviously haven’t written much in a few dayz… sorry there has been A LOT of shit going on!! Here’s the shortened version of all of it… sorry if I’ve posted a/b some of it b4… sorry if there is some details missing… when things upset me I tend to block them out… ohh and I’m bad w/ remember what day what happened… but I’ll try… and I think you’ll get the point of everything!! One last thing… I have less than 30 min… and I’m doing something else so I prolly won’t finish everything right now… I might after lunch! Also… sorry I keep remembering things… I’m on adderall again… not as much and uhhhh ohh yea I’m putting dates but I’m not 100% sure they’re right… but u can figure it out! X-)
LAST Monday (NOT 2day *duh*) [the 9th I think]--- hmm I know something happened… I’m just getting all of my days all mixed up! Grumph! I know that’s the day I took that adderall and all that… so I won’t post much a/b that b/c I posted enough that day to last me a year! But… my mom and g-ma leave for Branson to spend a couple of days and bring my uncle back w/ them
Tuesday (the 10th)--- wait a min. I did that REALLY long post on Tuesday last week not Monday! B/c Tuesday was an “a” day and that’s the day I have computer and I always skip civics to come in here and post! Okay!!! I TOLD YOU I GET MY DAYS BACKWARDS
Wednesday (the 11th)--- this is when all the good stuff starts! Okay… I saved like uh 40 mg. of adderall from Tuesday for Wednesday b/c on Tuesday Joe broke up w/ Codie and I had to (I didn’t HAVE to I WANTED (very much so)) to comfort her and threaten to kill Joe… so I didn’t get to spend much time w/ Jester… so I saved some adderall for on Wednesday so I could have some fun w/ Jester the next day (b/c I have lunch w/ him on B days… which that’s what wed. was) WELL!! We (me Jester and some other ppl) skipped 3rd and went into the gym… with coach McClung’s gym class… since Megan and a bunch of my friends are in there and he doesn’t give a rats ass (he’s the coolest teacher!!! He’ll ask us where we’re supposed to be and just tell us to get the work we missed and won’t turn us in for skipping or anything!!!) well it ended up me Jester, Ami, Megan, and Bryan and we were outside the gym on the black ass fault b/c coach wouldn’t let us go to the track… and Ami and Jester took off my Green Day shirt b/c I had on a Cami* under it (and no bra… grr) anyways! And Megan was in a tank top and her bikini top and Ami was in Megan’s other tank top. Well it got REALLY hot so Bryan got the bright idea to start a water fight… so he got a water bottle… went inside the gym filled it up w/ COLD water from the water fountains and started throwing it on me, Megan, and Ami! Well Jester made a deal w/ Bryan that if he didn’t get him wet he’d help Bryan get us… well they got us each a/b 5 times! It felt good but it was still COLD and we were in a cloths and shoes and everything! Of course Jester ended up getting wet b/c I have him BIG hugs and sat in his lap. Then we just chilled out for a while… Ami and Jester fucked w/ me turning me on… and I ended up falling over (literally) well Jester decided that he HAD to go to fourth period… it didn’t take me long to change his mind… hehehe… so Jester, Me, Ami, and Bryan went off campus skipping… Jester and I made Bryan and Ami leave so we could have a little fun… (nothing SERIOUS happened) well something (idk for sure what) happened w/btwn. Bryan and Ami. Ami came back upset (a/b something else… don’t want to go there) and fainted. Long story short the bell rang… we came back to skewl… didn’t get caught… all was good… or so we thought! My mom, g-ma, and uncle all came home!
Thursday (the 12)--- Alex gets REALLY pissy at me b/c Jester skipped 3rd and 4th periods to be w/ me… and with holds him from me. Ami starts claiming Bryan raped her… and Jessie comes out saying Bryan raped her a week or so back at her house. Little does every1 know… Bryan (a week b4 [Wednesday the one b4 when Ami’s “rape” occurred]) literally drug me down off campus… & forcefully did some stuff to/with me. A big thing explodes! All truths are told… and Bryan get’s charges filled on him from me, Ami, and Jessie. Idk what to believe a/b Ami’s claim… Bryan says nothing happened… and Ami likes to get a lot of attention… but idk for sure! Jessie’s I believe… she has never given me reason not to! Mine of course I believe… well NO1 believes me or ami! But ohh well… ppl now believe me b/c I’ve showed them 6 bruises from him! Alex and I got into a big fight…
Friday (the 13th)--- everything is settled btwn. Me and Alex… we’re friends again… and he lets Jester out :-D… Bryan is NOWHERE to be found (still haven’t seen him) basically word spreads… and every1 is questioning every1! Jester and I spend lunch 2gether and I send him to Chemistry… even though I skipped in the gym w/ Megan, Ami, Crystal… and a bunch of other ppl! Well fourth per. Rolls around and Ms. Boone’s class is in the gym(my class) and so is Senior Lyle’s (Jester’s class) so we got to spend fourth 2gether b4 the weekend! When I got home… my dad and uncle took the boat out to my lake house and stayed the night
Saturday (the 14th)--- my mom and I got up early and went and picked up Codie and took the wave runner out to the lake to stay for the weekend! We got out there and we went out on the lake and had a good time!!! Then me, Codie, my dad, my uncle, and my cousin all went fishing… but me and Codie just played Uno and we ended up catching as much as the guys did… NOTHING!! Then we went home ordered pizza called a few ppl REALLY hyper… watched School of Rock and fell asleep
Sunday (the 15th)--- we woke up and spent most of the day out on the lake! :-D we just had a good day and chilled then headed home around 7! I got home around 8:30! Yep yep!! We had a lot of fun… I could type more… but I won’t!
TODAY Monday (the 16th)--- I got up… reluctantly… and came to skewl… not too much has happened! I stole some adderall from Marvin… who still doesn’t know! Then I went to first Lunch… let Bracken and Furby hang out (they’re going out now) Bracken took Furby’s chain. Then I came in here!! (I stopped typing for a while when I got to what happened on Friday to go to lunch and now I’m back) at 2nd lunch… I just chilled w/ Jester… I have him an adderall and he just held me all of lunch (he stands behind me and wraps his arms around me and holds me as we stand there) it was so sweet!!! Occasionally he’d turn his head and kiss me on the cheek! I love him so much! :-D
Now then… Alex is writing a book (a VERY good book so far) and he’s finished w/ Ch. 2 and half of 3 so I’m gonna break and read that b4 I type any more! WOW that’s really going good!!! Ask him if you want to read it!! Well… that’s all I have to say (for now)
Here are a few poems and poem pieces! If you have a question a/b any of the meanings or who they are too gimme a holla… and yes these are all MY poems that I came up w/ on my own… they are raw emotion… my emotion!
*if you see one that says “untitled” and you think you have good title… hit me up w/… I’m always open for ideas!!!*
*the ones that say “*could be added to” are still in progress… some are completed though… it depends on the emotion I have evolved already*
Hate Me Now
You broke my heart,
But I still love you!
You say you want to be my friend
You say you want to be there for me
You see me everyday
I am greeted with a hug and smile
As you hug me,
My stomach flips over
You ask me what’s wrong
And with a fake smile,
I reply nothing.
I turn around and whisper everything
You see my face filled with pain
You hear my silent screams
You beg me to tell you what’s wrong
You say you want to help.
If you want to help,
Hate me NOW so I can move on!
- Heather R. Tyrrell
Untitled
You’re always on my mind
It’s you I want to find.
I want to hate you so bad,
But that will never happen!
I’m addicted to you pain
I feel like I’m going insane!
I wish you were here,
I wish you were near!
But your not,
You are gone
That is what I forgot
It’s time I let go,
It’s time I move on.
Thinking of this,
My heart starts to bleed,
It’s you that I need!
-Heather R. Tyrrell
Need To Bleed
The rush of blood is what I long for
I want to feel like I did before.
Why do I always feel this need…
This strong need to bleed.
The razorblade is tempting me
I pick it up to set myself free.
I feel better, I’ve done the deed,
I’m relaxed as I start to bleed.
Now that I’ve started,
I can’t be stopped.
I look around as it starts to fade
The tears start falling as I drop the blade
What did I do?
I just wanted to feel new!
I said that I’d stand tall,
But I knew I would fall
I proved myself right
I lost the fight!
Don’t do what I have done
Don’t stop, just run!
For you it’s not to late
But I have sealed my own fate.
- Heather R. Tyrrell
Untitled
All I wanted was to feel your soft touch.
To embrace you, to have you to kiss.
But what I got was not that
I got pain I did not deserve
- Heather R. Tyrrell
*could be added to
Untitled
As I slide farther into the darkness,
I think of what you blindly did to me.
But it wasn’t you- I knew what I did.
I knew we would lose it all in a fight.
-Heather R. Tyrrell
*could be added to
Untitled
Pain filled tears fall again
Silent screams heard aloud
Hearts are now breaking
All for your happiness
- Heather R. Tyrrell
*could be added to
Untitled
Voices screaming,
Ears ringing
Pain and hurt
It’s all so fake
When all you fell
Is nothing- numbness
- Heather R. Tyrrell
Lost
I’ve never wanted to die so bad
If I were gone, you’d just be glad
I look in the mirror and cry,
Just wishing that girl would fucking die!
My poems all sound the same
They all sound so lame
I want to get out of sight
I can’t seem to get it right!
But I know what is true,
I just don’t know what to do
But I WON’T take my life
Not even with this knife!
That’s the easy way out,
I’ll take a different route
Though I don’t know where to turn,
I’d rather be lost like I am,
Then not be at all!
- Heather R. Tyrrell
Well, that’s all I’ve got for right now! I hope you enjoyed!
These are the sites for my other journals! Check them out!... sometimes I post the same thing on all 3 sometimes it’s diff. depends!!
Greatest Journal:::::::::
http://www.greatestjournal.com/users/bad_tink_1369/
Xanga:::::::::
http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=bad_tink_1369
Current mood: flirty Current music: the hum of computers at skewl
Friday, May 13, 2005
I'm new to LiveJournal... i have Xanga and Greatest Journal so here's a couple of those entries combined into one!! ^.^
Monday-
well, i just got inside from mowing the yard... and i'm wearing a tank top and shorts... the point of me telling you this is b/c i can see ALL of the around 500 cuts on my legs and arm it looks pretty bad... but everytime i see a cut i find a reason for why it's there... whether it be from having a bad day to getting yelled at to having some1 i love die. i'm tired of making all of these excuses... but everytime i look at the cuts and remember the pain i felt it makes me want to do it again... idk why but it does!!!
Today i didn't even have a bad day! i was w/ all of my friends and i got to chill w/ Jester at lunch... sure some1 got pissed at me this morning but they got over that after we talked it all out!! but i still have the strongest urge to cut! but i'm not goign too b/c i've made so many promises to those that i love and that love me... and the last thing i want to do is hurt them!
Ami is supposed to leave tomorrow :'( (Ami being my girlfriend) she's going to Fordice** to a Youth Home... it sux! and i'm really gonna miss her! yet, another loved one that i'm losing... i'm sick of everything!! GRR! i'm sick of having Borderline Personality Dissorder and sick of being Bipolar! *hits self in head* ^.^
i'm sick of it all!!!!!
Tuesday AM-
Well, fair warning… I’m at skewl right now and I’m a bit fucked up on adderall… 60 Milligrams and I still have 40 to take… but I’ll save that for a little later… hehehe! Well… right now I’m in the mood to write so here goes!!
Right now I’m wearing my FAVORITE blue jeans that are ripped on the left knee… and my Blue Happy Bunny shirt that sayz crazy doesn’t even begin to cover it… hehehe so right!!! And I’m wearing my necklace that I always wear w/ the lock and key … and I have a real lock… a combination lock attached to it… and hell if I know what the combination is!! And then I’m wearing my 12 gauge earing and my 14 gauge bar (w/ a pink red and white stripped ball on the front and a silver ball on the back) on my left ear and I’m wearing my short bar w/ a flat silver cover on the front and my black and white “zebra” ball on the back!! My hair is up and why in the hell am I saying all of this??? Well I blame the adderrall… anyways! My mom isn’t home so it’s just me and my dad until uhh Thursday ^_^ I getta have a little fun w/ Jester!! Ohh… so EVERYONE knows…
Alex and I are NOT going out!!!! It’s me and JESTER!!!
Sorry had to say that! alex is trying to keep me and Jester away from each other but ohhh well he’s not gonna win!!
Now to the cutting part of this entry… I didn’t cut… though the erge** was SOO strong I just sat in my chair and read my book…. Which I will tell you a/b in a min. my cuts are healing which is good but they itch really bad… I’m trying not to itch them so hopefully they won’t scar! So I’m doing pretty good as long as that goes… I’m really trying ya’ll I really am! I’m doing it for all of ya’ll!!! I think of every1 of you that I have gotten to know… and even those that I haven’t every day!! Keep strong!!! Oh… sorry a/b yesterday’s entry… and all the shit a/b being Borderline and Bipolar… I as having a Borderline day… so you know Borderline Personality Disorder sucks ass… there’s a lot to it. And it would take me days to explain it…at least what it does to me. One thing I do know… it makes me push away the ones I love the most... they think it’s b/c I only care a/b them but It’s really not… it’s b/c I don’t want them to feel like it do!! I’m dealing with this everyday! Some days I get soo depressed! I get so mad at my mom… b/c it’s her fault I have this horrible disorder! But then I realize there’s not much she can do a/b it!!! I love my mommy and I miss her soo much (I’m adopted for those of you that don’t know) I can’t wait to get to see her this summer… I’m just afraid that I’m never going to want to come back… back to the life that I know is best for me with parents that DO care about me and DO want to see me do good!! I may act like I don’t care a/b them and that I hate them but I really don’t!! sometimes I don’t like them, but I’ll always love them… especially when I look at my older sister Kayla, and I see how bad off she is b/c she didn’t get the chance that Brandi, Bailey and I did. (Bailey is 13 and Brandi is 11) Kayla didn’t get to ever get away… she went with my dad’s mom and when she died she went back to my mom and her abusive druggie boyfriends… my mom got hooked on drugs fast! When the state finally realized what was going on they took Kayla and put her in foster care… she was so bad off she had to be put into a phyc-ward time thing… idk what else to call it! She’s in foster care again and struggling along… a very painful struggle might I add… she doesn’t want to see me or my sisters b/c she knows we got a chance… I’m the worst of the 3 that got adopted but nowhere near as bad as Kayla! And I’m the worst simply b/c I was the oldest! I don’t get to be with my sisters as much as I would like!! I wish we weren’t adopted away from each other but I understand why we were… it was b/c I took care of my sisters like they were my own… at the age of 5 ½ when I was taken away I had already grown up TOO fast… they (the state and my new parents and every1) wanted me to at least get the chance to have a normal child hood… so it was vowed that out new parents would keep us in touch. I know I’m rambling a/b this… but things really kinda went *phhhhhft (sticks out tongue)* when I had to, well didn’t have to, I CHOSE to go to Maumelle park to the picnic for ROTC… that’s where Bailey, Brandi, and I would always meet when we were little… I didn’t realize how much it would affect me… and it didn’t really until this weekend when Bailey and Brandi both called me to see if I could go to the movies and I couldn’t go! Then I had one of my mood swings yesterday and it all came crashing down… but I’m okay now!! I guess I just really miss my sisters and mom… and dad too but I’ll never get to see him… and I’ll never forget his face when he drowned and when the pulled him out… how his lifeless body just sat there and I ran over and cried b/c daddy wouldn’t wake up… and how my mom had to pry me off and how I was screaming and crying… though I was only 4 I remember it like yesterday! I remember the most… even more than Kayla… b/c of my age… and my photographic memory. Kayla was gone at the time of all this… she live with my g-ma until the age of 15 (she’s 17 now) so she didn’t know what it was like in the beginning… she doesn’t know what my sisters and I really did go through. Lately memory’s of my mom’s boyfriend’s… hitting her to the ground… blood flying from the new wound on her face… her never going out… and if she did it was to finish a drug deal and she would always wear turtle necks and sunglasses! I remember finding her in her room crying when one of her boyfriends would come up missing or just left her. I remember the trailer I had to live in for 5 ½ years of my life! I remember it all crystal clear! No one believes me though… they say I was too young! But I do remember 1) I have photographic memory… 2) though at a young age… no1 could forget those horrific events!! I cried myself to sleep last night with guilt b/c I said I hated my mom… it wasn’t her fault… her mom was the same as her and she never go the chance to get away and break the cycle…and I am… it’s not her fault she was a Borderline (not was is) I just want to pick up the phone and call her… but I can’t! she won’t talk to me! She won’t talk to any of us! She realizes that we are getting a new start… that we have a chance she didn’t ever get and she never wants us to come back! I remember her telling me that too… I remember her exact words… I was seven… Bailey was sitting beside me and Brandi was on my knee… we were in a DHS conference room… she had actually showed up for a meeting, which surprised everyone. “girls, you know I love you very much, you know if I could take care of you I would. I fought so hard for you three when we went to court I walked out crying screaming ‘your just trying to take my babies away from me’ as much as it hurts me to do and say this, I must give you up *starts crying* I will not be in any more meetings. You girls are not to call me, to try to find me. This is my good-bye. You girls are going to get a chance that I never got and that Kayla will probably never get. Embrace it! I love you all very much! *turns face and gets up to leave* *turns around at the door confusion filling the Brandi’s face (she was young)* I love you three! Good-bye!” *walks out door* I haven’t seen her since, though I have talked to her! I am getting to go see her this summer… much to her dismay but there are a lot of questions that I need answered! She understands that I will never be okay if I do not get the chance to ask them. But my younger sisters will never get the chance. I must answer the questions for them… they ask me so many… I answer as best as I can. Though I know it may hurt them… but I tell them the truth… Bailey doesn’t remember much… she doesn’t even remember dad dying (which is good) and Brandi remembers nothing… she was too young… but they do ask me what it was like! I do lie a/b that as much as I can w/o straying TOO far.
Wow, okay I didn’t realize I had written that much… but it was something that needed to be said… that’s why I normally cut… b/c of all that I know and remember from that… I try and blame other things… but I know deep down that’s why!!
Lunch time
<3
Heather
AKA: Bad_TiNk_1369
Ps. I might write more after lunch… so sorry a/b all the writing!
Tuesday PM-
okay... thank you to all of you that read that really long post that i did b4 this one... and commented... it means a lot to me... wether you believe me or not! oh and another thing... just to avoid any and all confusion... i PROMISE that i'm NOT lying a/b anything that i said! (people always ask me that or question it in some way)
otay... onto the point of this... i think every1 that commented told me that i'm strong. yes, i am strong (that's just who i am) but you can be too!! yes i had a shitty childhood... but many of you have had bad lives too! this may sound really stuck up... or it might piss you off... but it still must be said... b/c of the FACT that i did go through so much shit... i've let myslef become a statistic... one of the ones that says children in abusive situations are more like to cut and blah blah blah... you get the point! i could use that as an excuse but i'm not going to! now... after all of you have read that... some of you realize that you do have a good life (at least compared to mine... it may still be bad i don't really know)... if you are one of those that realized that why are you still cutting! if i can stop then you can too!! :-D i love each and every1 of you in this community even if i havn't met you! know that i'm always here to listen!
on another note (replying to a comment) yeah...well, i'm gunna put it bluntly and i'm REALLY sorry if it offends you...but wow, you had a REALLY sucky childhood. that is probably tied with the worst i've ever known...and you, only cutting, is like, amazing. i'm going to honor you on just that. and then seeing that you have this problem and wanting it to stop is also absolutely amazing....i feel amazingly weak now that i've read that. looking at my life, it's heaven compared to what you went through. just...wow...*bows* that's amazing. that you haven't even killed yourself! i would be dead by now, most likely. i'm shocked. *hug* i honor you greatly for that. and then you still love everyone in your family, regardless of what they do. i mean...that's just amazing. *hehe, this is turning into a rant too :P* --- a comment from Laura AKA never_forgiven6 first off i did reply to that... so i'm repeating myself a little but it's something i want to say to every1! 1st that DOES NOT offend me! i know i had a shitty childhood... and i know that i can make my FUTURE alot better. yes, i have tried to kill myself in the past... but i never could press down on the blade hard enough, i could never pull the trigger, i could never take enough to kill me! after a/b 5-6 (and after my cousin who was very close to me killed himself and i saw the impact it had on family and myself) attempts i finally realized... it's not worth it!! it really isn't! i also realized that i must be here for some reason... though i don't know that reason in full yet. right now i'm finding it to be telling other's my story to try and hopefully help them! to show them a strong person and show them how they can also be strong! though, (and i will not lie) i do have urges to kill myslef... to end it all... and obviously i slip up from time to time on the cutting... i know i can make it through... w/ the help of my friends and those that love me! (which of course are some of you) this is my look on things... Everyone says that cutting and all that shit is taking the easy way out... but i think if you cut and don't try to and (obviously) don't kill yourself your being brave... b/c it takes alot to say no when you have that blade sliding against your wrists... knowing a little more pressure and you could end it all... and i think the bravest ones yet are the ones that are able to realize they DO have a problem and try to stop it... even if they slip up a couple of times... (yes i just called myself "brave" but i don't want to come off as full of myself or anything like that!! i have worked very hard to get to where i could even BEGIN to type everything that i shared today... it's a long hard journey... and you have to be willing to make it... and you have to know that you will slip up and when you do you don't need to slip farther... you need to get up and try even harder!!
i really didn't mean for this to come off sounding like some sort of a lecture or something... (if that's how your taking it) i just really do believe EVERY ONE of you has what it takes to become a "brave" or "strong" person!!
i'm ALWAYS here for those that need me to listen and that might need a little advice!! though i know this is what this communtiy is all a/b if ANYONE needs to talk one or one or anything... or just needs a little advice (on just a/b anything) gimme a holla!!!
E-mail: jstCoMpLiCaTeD29@yahoo.com
AIM: jstCoMpLiCaTeD29 or bad_TiNk_1369 (either... if i'm on one i'm on the other)
Yim: of course the same as the e-mail!!
i'm seriously here for every1!!
I LOVE YOU ALL! YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE STRONG!!!
again, i'm sorry if this sounded like a lecture or sounded like i was/am full of myself... that's not how i meant it to!!!
<3
Heather
AKA: Bad_TiNk_1369
that's all for now!
much love!
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AKA Bad_tink_1369
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